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Communication…..It’s Complicated

 If there were ever a more misunderstood and under appreciated concept than communication, it would be news to me. If communication were a cartoon character, it would be Charlie Brown. Lonely. Moody. Disgruntled. Unheard. Confused. Good intended. And occasionally, it would make people so happy, they would carry it around on their shoulders while yelling, “Hoo-Rah!” But communication is not a cartoon character. It is a word. And it’s complicated.

For starters, it’s five syllables long. Really? The word that describes the act of sharing ideas, thoughts and opinions is five syllables long? That’s four too many. And look at the phonetic spelling: [kuh-myoo-ni-key-shuh n]. What the? Hooked on phonics? No thanks. I think I’ll pass. Did Dick and Jane ever communicate? No! They saw. They ran. They looked. They played. They worked (apparently that book series was written before child labor laws were enacted). Simple words for simple concepts to help us learn what should be a simple skill.

Another challenge with communication is that there are many ways in which one can go about communicating. One can write, or speak, or tweet, or text, or blog, or sign, or sing, or whistle, or knock three times on the ceiling. Each one of these mechanisms carries its own set of challenges. Each one of these mechanisms requires an initiator and receiver. And each of these characters has to be spot on with knowing their respective roles. If you text someone, and the recipient does not receive it, well, then you have communication breakdown. If you tweet and no one follows, then I guess that would make you a twit. If your listener is listening but does not hear the same thing you hear in your head as you speak, there may be catastrophe. Take for instance, my sister’s wedding. There I was—the maid of honor—trying to fix her train when she got up to the altar. The priest whispered to me to fix her veil, too, since it was apparently flying all over the place. What I heard was “Get off of my altar!” As a result, my sister got married with a half nicely fanned out, half wrinkled train behind her and a veil flowing with wild abandon over her head. Considering that marriage vows are all about contrast, it’s not so far removed from the wedding ceremony after all.

And yet, while communication is often blamed for the bad things that happen in life, it often takes the credit for the good things, too. Communication is the oft-cited number one reason for divorce. That is bad. Conversely, it was the art of communication that helped Cyrano de Bergerac land Roxanne. Good thing. It was Ronald Reagan’s skill as the “Great Communicator” that is given credit for Gorbachev tearing down that wall. Good. Poor communication is blamed for one of the single greatest tragedies our nation has ever faced. Bad. Communication can be the key to success. Good. It can also be the prime force in the disintegration of any organization. Bad. Communication can make your head spin. Good or bad, depending on if the head spinning is euphoric or nauseating.

This leaves us in quite the communication conundrum. The best course of action would be to keep the lines of communication open and hope for the best. For if we do not communicate, we cannot educate. If we cannot educate, we cannot innovate. Or mediate. Or moderate. Or liberate. Or deliberate. Or radiate. Or elevate. Or desegregate. Or illuminate. Or fascinate. Or procrea……oh, nevermind.

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