A.C.R.O.N.Y.M. is an acronym.
--as posted on Urban Dictionary
Scientists are a curious bunch--and I'm not just talking about our yearning for answers. We tend to use big words like pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis, which basically means something icky is junking up your lungs. Actually, I had never seen that word until about 24 seconds ago when I googled "big science words." But still, we use big words and because we like to pat ourselves on the back for being so busy saving the human race, the planet, the universe and cute puppies from total destruction, we don't have a lot of time to waste using those big words. Solution? Acronyms.
The acronym that gets my vote for most explanatory and least creative is RING, which literally means Really Interesting New Gene. The RING finger domain is a structural characteristic that allows proteins to bind to other proteins. What they do after that is their business. Just as boys will be boys, proteins will be proteins.
I once asked students to guess what RING meant. The answers ranged from the logical and slightly ingenious sequence of amino acids, aRginine-Isoleucine-asparagiNe-Glycine to the creative, but not in the ball park reference to brain/plant science interface, Rationally Integrated Neurons Germinating. My favorite was the honest, lay it all out on the table, Really, I'm Not [a] Genius.
Acronyms don't just have a home in the science world; they also are quite comfortable in the business world. One such acronym that had me puzzled for a while is R.O.I. Given my background in imaging, I thought for the longest time that this meant Region of Interest. On an X-ray or picture of an electrophoresis gel, I can pick out ROIs with the best of 'em. Sitting in a board room, though, I oft wondered what the heck are they talking about with Region of Interest? Is this the same as market sector? Customer base? Territory? What the?
I'd nod and agree right along with the other bobble heads in the room when asked if everyone understood what the presenter meant. It took a while to discover that R.O.I. means Return on Investment. Now, one might think that this has something to do with money matters (investment). One would be wrong to think so. The ROI has infiltrated every reach of the businessphere. Need to allocate a block of time to draft a memo? What's the ROI? Should you really draft that memo? Think about it. Need to determine what the ROI is on drafting a memo? Do you really have the time to invest? What's the ROI on determining the ROI? Think! Think!
And think, I did...about other things ROI could mean. While these terms are not official in any way, shape or form, they might be somewhat familiar to you dear reader. After all, isn't every day a montage of sitcom scenes, drawing from Roseanne, The Office, Mad Men, The Big Bang Theory, Friends, Seinfeld and probably a few others I can't think of right now.
Enjoy. Or don't enjoy. Depends on your ROI.
Reluctantly Opting In: For those times when your boss needs a "volunteer" to take on a new task. You really don't have the time, but being told you'd be perfect for the job jolts your self confidence. It might reflect well on your next performance appraisal. Who knows? Might even lead to a promotion. And so, you ROI.
Random Optic Inertia: Medical condition linked to looking at a computer screen all day. Popping up when you least expect it, your eyes will suddenly refuse to work. Your optic nerve goes on strike. Visual stimulation just not happening. You have ROI.
Really Obstinate Individual: Every office has an ROI. Deal with it.
Read On Idiot: What you'd like to say when someone half-replies to your email or asks questions that you've already answered. Your response? Dear So-and-so, thank you for your response. You will find the answers to your questions if you'd just ROI.
Rest Of It: Where you should direct the person who did not ROI. Dear colleague, if you'd just ROI, you'll find the ROI. Be somewhat forgiving. Your colleague may be suffering from ROI (see second definition). Or, he/she could just be an ROI (see third definition).
Radically Old Idea: It's been tried a number of times before. Failed. Every. Time. But still, you will always find a team member willing to give an ROI the old college try.
Recalcitrant Office Insubordinate: Sort of like the ROI, but takes it a step further by refusing to follow any directive from above.
Reversal Of Insult: You are sure you were just called dumb. Not sure how it happened. It sounded nice the way the person said it. We're you just called dumb? How about launching an ROI and tactfully thanking the person for the compliment? Watch the jaw drop and the eyes wander as he/she asks whether they just experienced an ROI.
Running Out [of] Ideas: Tends to happen on those 4PM Friday meetings when everyone just wants to beat the traffic. While I don't have any traffic to beat, given that it is Saturday morning in the confines of my own home, I am ROI at present.
With that, I bid you adieu till next time, dear readers.