So, I am not exactly the beacon of organization. I know this. I hide it well, but I know this to be true. Well, I guess I hide it well except for the four stacks of papers on my desk with themes like "stuff to file", "stuff to read", "stuff to read and then file" and "?". Another tell-tale sign lies deep within the drawer of my cherished antique desk that I once restored and saved from that ghastly, thick layer of dark green paint by which it was once covered. I pray that no nosey parkers open it, for inside lies every greeting card I've ever received, old keys, old key chains, junk mail that I refuse to believe is junk, all swimming around waiting to see the light of day. Or, more realistically, light of the living room. But, I digress.
Anywho, although my organizational skills are a figment of the imaginations of those who hire me for my organizational skills, and that is a shortcoming, I am capable of learning from my mistakes. Please allow me to share my latest lessons learned that may save me (and you, if you are like me) some valuable time on that typical day where you are running late and just cannot afford to waste time on frivolous tasks like finding your car keys.
1. When you arrive home after a long day at work and it is dark and cold and rainy, and you realize as soon as you walk through the front door that you left your watch in the car, go immediately to the car and get it. Do not say to yourself, "Oh well. I'll get it in the morning. I won't forget it is in the car. What moron would do that?" This happened to me this week. Tired, cold, damp and not wanting to trek back across the street to my car (I had already set my keys down and had taken my coat off), I just decided to leave my watch in the car with the assumption that I would remember where it is in the morning. Never make assumptions. The next morning I spent ten good minutes looking for said watch before I remembered those words I said to myself the previous evening, "You won't forget your watch is in the car. Just leave it."
2. When you look in the mirror with your glasses on, say to yourself out loud so you can hear, "Hey, I am wearing my glasses. They are on my face." Do this to avoid the inevitable and embarrassing fifteen minutes wasted looking for glasses that are ON YOUR FACE!
3. If you use your phone as an alarm clock, please put it in the same room in which you are sleeping.
4. I do not think I have to explain why number 3 is imperative.
5. If you remember to put your alarm clock/phone in the same room in which you are sleeping, also check to see that it is off "silent."
6. See number 4.
7. When you come home from work and change clothes and as you do so, a button falls off your sweater, sew it back on immediately. Do not put it off with the rationale that you will do it when you are less tired, or during the Bears game, or after dinner, etc. Invariably, you will forget about the missing button until you put on the sweater on the same morning that numbers 1-6 happen and you really don't want to wear anything else. You will find yourself relenting and spending another 30 minutes (I have fat fingers, don't laugh) doing a quick mending job with unmatched thread.
So there you are. Learn from my mistakes. Heloise might have some helpful hints, but I have many d'oh moments from which my wisdom pours forth. And, whatever.
Anywho, although my organizational skills are a figment of the imaginations of those who hire me for my organizational skills, and that is a shortcoming, I am capable of learning from my mistakes. Please allow me to share my latest lessons learned that may save me (and you, if you are like me) some valuable time on that typical day where you are running late and just cannot afford to waste time on frivolous tasks like finding your car keys.
1. When you arrive home after a long day at work and it is dark and cold and rainy, and you realize as soon as you walk through the front door that you left your watch in the car, go immediately to the car and get it. Do not say to yourself, "Oh well. I'll get it in the morning. I won't forget it is in the car. What moron would do that?" This happened to me this week. Tired, cold, damp and not wanting to trek back across the street to my car (I had already set my keys down and had taken my coat off), I just decided to leave my watch in the car with the assumption that I would remember where it is in the morning. Never make assumptions. The next morning I spent ten good minutes looking for said watch before I remembered those words I said to myself the previous evening, "You won't forget your watch is in the car. Just leave it."
2. When you look in the mirror with your glasses on, say to yourself out loud so you can hear, "Hey, I am wearing my glasses. They are on my face." Do this to avoid the inevitable and embarrassing fifteen minutes wasted looking for glasses that are ON YOUR FACE!
3. If you use your phone as an alarm clock, please put it in the same room in which you are sleeping.
4. I do not think I have to explain why number 3 is imperative.
5. If you remember to put your alarm clock/phone in the same room in which you are sleeping, also check to see that it is off "silent."
6. See number 4.
7. When you come home from work and change clothes and as you do so, a button falls off your sweater, sew it back on immediately. Do not put it off with the rationale that you will do it when you are less tired, or during the Bears game, or after dinner, etc. Invariably, you will forget about the missing button until you put on the sweater on the same morning that numbers 1-6 happen and you really don't want to wear anything else. You will find yourself relenting and spending another 30 minutes (I have fat fingers, don't laugh) doing a quick mending job with unmatched thread.
So there you are. Learn from my mistakes. Heloise might have some helpful hints, but I have many d'oh moments from which my wisdom pours forth. And, whatever.
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